Surfing the Christian Life in Ever-Changing Tides

The ocean is choppy as the high tide slowly washes ashore. And as I sit here talking with God; I am reminded that life is much the same way. Not smooth and things that we desire seem to come slowly. God has reminded me too that as it is a process for the ocean tide to change; it’s a process for our lives also. As a Christian, our growth and maturity come slowly; for we do not become mature over night in life and we defiantly can’t become a mature Christian overnight either. It’s an ever-growing relationship as we dive into the Word, die to the flesh, spend time in prayer and getting to know the Father more intimately each day.

Accepting Christ  as my Lord and Savior in January 2008; I hadn’t a clue as to how I was suppose to act, behave or even what to do as a Christian. And believe me; I got a lot of things wrong. When I accepted Christ, He deposited seed into me for the calling He has placed upon my life. However, it has been up to me to nurture those seeds so that the calling grows thus bringing a harvest. Slowly we are getting there as there have been set backs and complete wipe outs in my walk. And each time, I asked God to forgive me and I too have had to ask others to forgive me because I was surfing this Christian walk all wrong. I was guilty of using Bible verses to show others they were wrong, I was judgmental, prideful, arrogant, disobedient, controlling, angry, hateful, unthankful, unholy, lustful, selfish and self-centered. These things just don’t change overnight. God changes us but we have to want it and be willing to receive correction.

 The enemy will remind us of our past even through our senses; I call these triggers because it sets you back to a particular place or person from the past. He uses these to try and throw us off our Christian walk by speaking to our flesh. It’s a constant battle between the spirit and the flesh and I failed more times than I want to admit. But I have learned when you wipe out; get back up and ride again.

***2 Timothy 3:2 (KJV) For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy.

*** Ephesians 4:19 (NIV)They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts.

***Colossians 1:21 (NIV) Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior.

Fast forward to now; as I look back over the past 10 years, it’s been a choppy ride. However, I have learned many things from life lessons and the wisdom and knowledge that have been deposited into me through the highs and the lows. As I dig deeper into the things of God, nuggets of wisdom are placed into my spirit. God is cheering me on for He is my biggest cheerleader. He wants us all to succeed in our walk with Him and in life.  Whereas satan wants us to fail at everything and completely wipe out and stay down. Sometimes it feels like for every step forward we get knocked back three, but we are winners through Christ. We only loose when we give up!

I have realized that our greatest sermons come from our life experiences; thus using our own testimony. As this is the life that we lived so what better way to help someone who is going through than to have experienced it for ourselves. Not that we are proud of our past; but being an overcomer we are able to help others overcome the same. Not to be prideful but to witness in humility from the lessons learned the hard way, as we now live a life for God completely changed with evidence seen in our daily lives.  

I want to please God in all that I do, say, think, etc. and I pray daily that He never takes the Holy Spirit from me. Ten years ago I didn’t even realize that the Holy Spirit would even reside within me, but now I can’t imagine a life with out Him! Over the last decade there have been many trials and tribulations; some that were major set backs as I turned from God to live in the flesh. It’s a daily battle to overcome fleshly desires and no one is immune; but the Holy Spirits guidance, makes it possible.

I can’t say that every fleshly desire is conquered as of yet; as I am reminded daily of my past, what I lost, what I don’t have and that I am alone (meaning no husband or companion). Our Heavenly Father will give us the desires of our heart, just to show us that perhaps that is not what we truly want. But you know… I am good with alone as I grow and dance with God. For I know at the appointed time regardless of how slow it may seem to me the Father will allow my husband to cut in. It’s my place to seek God above any other relationship, for God is a jealous God and wants us to desire to be with Him more than any other. And although I desire to be married with a large family; my greatest desire is to continue dancing with God and being used to glorify Him with everything I do. Just as it is with the ever-changing tide of the ocean, so has been my walk with God but praise the Lord I am changing and maturing every day. Maturity in Christ takes time….time in the Word, time in prayer and time alone with the Father desiring His Best for Us!

Keep on surfing as the tides in life change and if you wipe out; get back up, repent and ride again!

To God Be All the Glory, Honor & Praise!

Love to You All,


Relentless Love in a Fleshly World

When God asked me to start writing this blog almost 2 years ago; I was very hesitant. Afraid to share the deepest and darkest truths of my life, but trusting God I proceeded. This wasn’t something I wanted to do, but God needed me to do so that not only would I heal, but help others. Believe me reliving secrets that I had chosen to forget not only hurt me but gets me lots of stares and talking behind my back. This bothered me at first but then I realized that being obedient to God was more important and I was receiving healing.

Through it all I finally realized I am more than what the world says I am, more than my past, more than just that shy-scared little girl, more than my bad choices, and more than who I had settled to be. My past doesn’t’ define who I am! However, the enemy will continually try to place you in the past by any means he can. His schemes are unrelenting but with God all things are possible; even standing for what is right when it means standing alone.

One thing for sure is that Gods love is relentless! He never leaves us or forsakes us; even when it feels like He has. I remind myself often that it’s when the teacher is silent that I am being tested. One awesome thing about test is when we pass one; we can move onto the next and not repeat that one again. Strength has definitely come from obedience and although I don’t understand this world sometimes, God carries me through always!

When I said the enemy will remind us of our past; here is an example:

I was recently asked out by someone who I had seen but I didn’t know him. At first he was saying all the right things through messages but after just 2 conversations by phone and carefully paying attention to the words (the fruit) that came out of his mouth, I realized that perhaps this nice Christian man wasn’t walking with God as close as I desire. I have asked God to guide me in dating for I don’t want to date just anyone. I don’t know about men but for a woman, heart connections are made when they start spending time with a man. And I don’t want heart connections made that are not of God. I want to save my heart for my husband; therefore I have to ask the Holy Spirit for direction for I want to make right choices. Sometimes our fleshly nature wants to fight but thank God I listened this time.

***Galatians 5:17(NIV) For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.

Being upfront and honest I told this man that my walk with God is the most important relationship that I will ever have. Then I proceeded to tell him that I don’t drink, don’t’ smoke, don’t spend nights, and that I don’t lay down and snuggle or have sex until I am married to the man. His response was “I hope you understand. I want someone affectionate like me.!” Well I got my answer and I completely understand. He was more interested in my body than my heart! Thank God I was obedient and bold enough to stand up for what is right!

Truth is I am very affectionate person but will only be that affectionate with my husband. Now the old me made lots of bad choices and snuggled just a little too quickly; but praise God I am not who I use to be!  At that moment is when I realized that this man was either a trap of the enemy to set me up for failure or a test from God on obedience. However my love for God is greater than the desires of my flesh. Oh how I long for a husband but I want the right one (the man God has hand picked for me). As of now my one true love is God and as I dance with Him, he will allow the right one to cut in at the right time.

***Romans 8:5(NIV)Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.

***1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (NIV) Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

As painstakingly tough as it may be to do the right thing, it is so worth it in the end. For settling for Mr. or Mrs. Wrong only brings heartache and boy do I know all about that! And when loneliness strikes us and the desire hits to have a person in the natural to love and hold us we might be apt to settle. But don’t! If physical is all we or they desire then that is exactly what will have to keep your relationship together; that is not true love. At my older age I have realized that what feels good right now may not make you feel good later. I want someone who loves me for my heart and not my body. We must control our flesh or it will control us and put us on a spiritual, physical, emotional and mental path of destruction.

***James 4:7 (NIV) Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

***Proverbs 4:23 (NIV) Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Ladies and gentlemen guard your heart above all else, for out of it flows life! Be watchful and ask God to guide you for the enemy seeks to kill, steal and destroy. Everyone who asks you out may not be good for you – test the spirits and be upfront. If you have a personal relationship with God then honor Him as your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Pray and ask God to prepare you and your future spouse for one another. Until then dance with God for He is our one true love that will never leave us. Wait for the one that loves you too much to disrespect you and your body, wait for the one who loves God first and more than he/she will ever love you. Wait for the one who will pray with and for you; wait for the one who leads you closer to God! It is so worth the wait to have the marriage you have dreamed of and a marriage made in Heaven!

To God Be All the Glory, Honor & Praise!

Much Love to You All!

Your Waiting Sister in Christ,



***Galatians 5:22-26

***John 10:10

***1 John 4:1-6

***Deuteronomy 5:33

Growing Pains

A long read but well worth it!

Growing up can be difficult with many harsh lessons along the way especially if we don’t listen to our parents for they try to teach us. The same can happen as an adult when we grow and mature in Christ. Developing that deep relationship with God takes you places you never dreamed and will open your eyes to the ugly truths we dare to face or even want to admit. Our Heavenly Father loves us even as He is correcting us; however we must be teachable and willing to receive the correction. And believe me; this can be very painful! Some of those harsh truths about ourselves are hard to swallow. But when God calls you out on it; you know you better listen.

One of Samantha’s friends is planning to get married and Samantha is to be in the wedding. Therefore all of the young ladies that are in the wedding are to meet in a city about 3 hours from here to try on dresses. This day just happens to be on the same weekend of our ladies conference at church. So when she told me about this; immediately I said, “That’s the conference weekend we can’t go! Aren’t you suppose to dance? Isn’t there another weekend you all can do this?” Little did I realize that my not so baby girl was planning to spend the night there and mama wasn’t wanted on this trip.

You see she has never driven any long distance alone so I assumed that I was going to go with her. Afraid to let her go alone and drive this distance it was hard for this single mama bear to swallow. It’s tough when your baby doesn’t need or want you for everything anymore, especially when you have been the only constant in her life and she in yours. Little did I know, but we both had some growing up going on and God was about to get me straight.

     ***Philippians 4:13 (NKJV) I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Panic mode hit after I realized Samantha didn’t want me to go. She’s grown up and ready to spread her wings and fly, but gosh it hurt! All I could think of was she’s never driven this far before and that drive alone wasn’t good for her. I guess I was really trying to wiggle my way into this trip. I was upset with her and afraid at the same time over this. But after telling her I would feel better if a friend at least rode with her; she got a female friend to go and my precious daughter has already booked their room. Wow, she has really grown up and it seems like over night!

     ***Hebrews 11:6 (NKJV) But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes  to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

     ***Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV) Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

A few weeks ago as I was sitting in a church service, before I knew Samantha’s friend was going with her, God spanked me good fashioned. It was a time of correction for me! I was thinking about this entire ordeal and was upset with her over it. But being mama bear I was mostly afraid something would happen if she went alone. Everything popped into my head from someone kidnapping her, to the car breaking down, to her getting lost, in a wreck or worse! Panic and fear had set in! But that Sunday morning in church God spoke to me and said, “Why do you not trust me?” “How do you expect to teach others to trust me when you don’t even trust me to take care of Samantha?” WOW!!  Just WOW!!  Talking about a revelation! That hit me like a ton of bricks!

I thought about what God said to me and He then reminded me that He gave His only Son for me. And that I don’t truly trust Him, if I can’t trust Him with my most prized earthly gift. After all, He gave me this precious gift and He has always taken care of us. He also reminded me that I pray for the safety of others all the time and that I can do the same for her. After reflecting on what God had said I had to repent to our Father and I had to ask Samantha to forgive me. Growing pains hurt but God is molding me as I grow in my relationship with Him.

All of this took place before summer break from school started; I got busy and didn’t think about it again until this past Sunday. As I was getting ready for church; God reminded me once again of this revelation of not trusting Him to protect Samantha. I tell her all the time that ALL things are possible to those who believe. And you know what, if I truly believe this then I should have no problem believing Gods got her and will protect her. After all she is His and He loves her more than me. So next weekend my not so little girl will take her first of many trips without her mama and guess what, she will be just fine! Gods got her and she is graced with divine favor and protection for she is a precious jewel in His eyes.

     ***Matthew 21:22 (NKJV) And whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.

     ***Matthew 19:26 (NIV) Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

Growing pains hurt but they are much needed for us to mature as adults and as Gods Chosen Vessels. We are called so we must be willing to receive correction when and where it is needed. Sometimes we are blinded and can’t see those ugly truths about ourselves; and as painful as it was to face; I thank God that He called me out to correct me! My prayer is that He continues to mold me and shape me by calling me out on any other ugly truths that I am blinded to!

     ***1 John 2:3-6(KJV) And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments. He that saith, I know him, and keepeth not his commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But whoso keepeth his word, in him verily is the love of God perfected: hereby know we that we are in him. He that saith he abideth in him ought himself also so to walk, even as he walked.

    ***Romans 8:32 (AMP) He who did not spare {even} His own Son, but gave Him up for us all, how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?

     ***Isaiah 41:10 (NKJV) Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.

It’s hard to face the ugly truth about ourselves; but it is much needed for us and those around us for correction to be done. It’s impossible to teach what you aren’t living! May God guide you and bless you as you grow and mature. Mama’s and Daddy’s our baby girls and boys grow up and we must be willing to let go. God gave them to us to train them up to send them out, not to hold them in bondage and never let them go. They can’t make a life of their own and see how far they can fly if we don’t cut the strings. God has great plans for their lives and as tough as it is to see our babies leave the nest, if we hold too tight we might loose them forever. Let go and trust God for He will never fail us! His Word never returns void as He is faithful and His promises are always true!

I share all of this and my previous post with you because God ask me to. And in obedience my prayer is that it helps someone in their life and their walk with God. If just one soul can be saved then all the ugly stares and snickers behind my back will be so worth it all. I do it all for my Father to let you know that He can change a person & a life! If you need a change in your life today, ask Him to come into it and be Lord! I promise, it’s the best decision you will ever make!!

If you need to talk with me, please comment  with your name, number and email address as they are only seen by me until I post and that I would not do to you. 

To God Be All the Glory!

Much Love,